The boys are back in town


It’s the future. Twenty-four (24) states seceded from the United States of America. They became New America.   A lot of things changed, but some things never change…

Maylocks retired with his second wife, Tiffany, to St. Disney, Florida (see Young at Heart). Tiffany was returning home that evening from a week-long trip with her mother to Disney’s New Jerusalem.  Maylocks was bored.  Sometimes he wished he had taken the Chief of Police job in New Brooklyn.  He was retired now for six months and they still hadn’t filled the position.  He was resolved to talk to Tiffany about it.

Drew Phylandera ran a show on the strip in New Atlantic City, where the boardwalk met the submarine wharf.  His girls were from only the best houses in the Mongolian Free States.  Ethnic Russians were the top girls of his “flesh” trade.  Although the flesh trade was lucrative, he also dabbled in drug trafficking, which was more of a hit or miss thing.  His biggest client was the Canada-Arctic Consortium and he was hoping for a deal with them.

Police Commissioner Trinidad Lovely was new to the position–only two months.  Her predecessor went to the Bahamas Free Zone and was lost at sea.  It was unusual to be lost at sea these days, not since the Dolphin Worldwide Net came into existence.  She needed the best candidate for Police Chief.  PC Lovely decided to go see Maylocks in person and offer him whatever it took to draw him out of retirement.  If she didn’t try and try again, the Mayor would send her back to being a Metro Court Judge.  She’d rather go back to stripping than go back there.

Drew Phylandera met with the representative from the Canada-Arctic Consortium, who placed an order that would make Phylandera a rich man.   Only one glitch:  they wanted it in one week–all of it.  There was only one place he could get that much quality stuff and quickly:  Bahamas Free Zone.  However, you couldn’t get there by regular transport.

It wasn’t Phylandera’s first time at the ball.  His top girl, Nevrtoluvya,  smuggled him into a client’s place of business and he and the girl transported to Freezone, Bahamas.  What Drew didn’t know was that the girl who was supposed to be ethnic Russian, was actually an agent of the EIP,  Earth’s Investigative Police.  They answered to no one and could go anywhere.

All the players were in their places.  Maylocks was in his new office of the Police Chief,   Drew Phylandera was in Bahamas Free Zone along with EIP Agent Nevrtoluvya.  Of them, only one knew that the former PC (Kisshasser) had not been lost at sea.  Former Mayor Blinder (who was charged in absentia for embezzlement in New Brooklyn) was the banker and PC Kisshasser was the drug supplier for Phylandera. They were acting under the direction of the person pulling the strings.

It didn’t take long for Phylandera to meet with Blinder and Kisshasser.  Drew’s gut feeling wasn’t good, but being in the Free Zone guaranteed no cop or government could touch him, so he went through with the deal.  Everything went well for Phylandera.  He thought it was ironic that the old Mayor and the PC, who faked his death, were crooks and helped him make his deal.  He was in his hotel room, packing up the drugs. when the Russian girl came in from her adjoining room looking particularly fine.  She helped him pack up the drugs.

Phylandera and the girl were getting pretty heavy when he heard someone clear his throat.  He sat up in bed and there stood two men in tropical shirts and shorts.  One had a handgun and the other a laser disrupter rifle.  The girl began dressing and cursed, asking the two men what took them so long.  Detectives Sty and Roswell ordered a very surprised Phylandera to get dressed. Agent Nevrtoluvya opened the drug bags and pulled out a scanner from under the bed.  They wouldn’t be able to take the drugs as evidence–they had “borrowed” them from some dealers in the Free Zone.  Scanning and a visual record was sufficient in court.

Then the person who had pulled the strings walked in–Police Chief Maylocks.  Drew Phylandera moaned pitifully.  Then Nevrtoluvya showed Drew her badge.  That’s when Drew puked his guts out all over the vintage carpeting.  Agent Nevrtoluvya took custody of Phylandera and everyone escorted her and Phylandera to the transporter station.  In actuality, the EIP Agent was kidnapping Phylandera, but the EIP answered to no one.  Once out of the Free Zone, Drew would be under arrest, immediately arraigned, judged, and imprisoned.

The Chief and his two best detectives couldn’t receive credit for what they did.  What mattered was that the EIP Agent gave the details about Phylandera’s flesh trade and already Drew’s captives were returned to their homes.  Maylocks was very late getting home, but Tiffany was happy knowing he wasn’t bored anymore.  She wasn’t bored, either.  She was busy decorating their new house in the nation’s capital, New Brooklyn.   Their six dogs were digging up the backyard and Billy Crystal, the macaw, wouldn’t shut up.  Maylocks and his wife sat by the pool listening to the dogs bark, Billy Crystal screaming, and the sounds of the city.  It was like hearing the noise of the past.  Life was back to normal.

“The end.”

“Wasn’t that a great story?  What did you learn from it?”

“It’s a fairytale, right, Grandpa?”

“Sure, sure.”

“Okay.  What did it mean that the girl and Phylan…Drew were getting heavy?”

“You know, it’s late and you need to go to sleep.”

” It must be about, you know.   I’m not stupid!   This is bull…”

“Sorry, sorry.  We’ll talk about that tomorrow.  Go to sleep.”

“Oh, alright, Grandpa.”

“Next, I’m going to read you a fairytale about a princess and true love.”

“Oh, come on, Grandpa, not that…”

Inspiration Monday:  Infant Memoirs  @ Be Kind Rewrite
Prompt:  Noise of the Past
Word Count:  <1000

Many thanks to Stephanie Orges for hosting Inspiration Monday at Be Kind Rewrite


When I was a kid I wanted to be an "atomic" scientist. Not anything my mother expected of me. Well, I became a scientist, just not an atomic one.

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Posted in fiction, humor, inspiration monday, sci-fi
15 comments on “The boys are back in town
  1. Doobster418 says:

    Interesting names you came up with for your story: Phylandera, Nevrtoluvya, Kisshasser, Blinder.

  2. Stephanie says:

    Haha. I love all the names. And this guy seriously has a problem telling age-appropriate stories, but it is so funny. I get the picture he’s the gruff old guy who’s got no idea what to do with a kid.

    • Lucy says:

      Well, I am assuming Mom is somewhere in the house and he wants to tell the bedtime stories. I believe she has no idea what he’s reading to him. Yeah, the names are weird. They’ll be back again one day, maybe. Lucy

  3. Kate Loveton says:

    I am on my lunch hour at work and have run out of time, but sure intend to revisit this story tonight and comment. I’ve only read the first two paragraphs, but I know I’m gonna love it! Hope you’re having a nice day. 🙂

  4. Kate Loveton says:

    Hi Lucy, just finished reading your very entertaining story. I loved how it ended (grandfather and the true love bit – how Peter Falk of you! very, very clever ending). I give this one an A plus.

    • Lucy says:

      Have you read the first story with the same characters: A Soliloquy? I like that one better. So far, you are the only person who got the Peter Falk connection. One of my first articles was about “mostly dead” tree in my backyard. I asked if anyone knew where the term came from, or who said it. Nothing. Glad you like it. Lucy

    • Lucy says:

      I gave u wrong story. young at heart was the first. Lucy

  5. Mark Gardner says:

    I always dig stories of secession. And like everyone else, great names. I just open a baby name book…

    • Lucy says:

      Typically I go to a website for names. Usually foreign names. I just had to make up these names. Hey, thanks for coming by. I appreciate the interest. Lucy

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© [Lucy Conrad] and [Sapient Chronicles], [2015-2016]. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to [Lucy Conrad] and [Sapient Chronicles] with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

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